One of those "where were you when" posts.

Sorry if it's not creative...

Where were you when you found out Princess Diana died?

I was with my post college/first year of real work boyfriend, Aaron, at Shoneys (big spenders, huh?) and his friend "Q" met us there. He asked if we had heard that Princess Diana had been in a wreck in Paris. We hadn't. That was about it until we got to Aaron's teeny tiny apartment and I turned on the TV and saw that she was dead.

That whole year (my first year of teaching) I got a whole lotta BAD POETRY from my creative writing students about "the people's princess".

Blah

I have done something to my left knee. I don't know what, but it is numb in places and hurts in others. I haven't decided if I'm going to Primed to get it checked out yet. I hate sitting in those germ infested places if I absolutely don't have to. I had Chris wrap it in an Ace bandage to give me a little bit of solace/stability last night. Right when I have to go back to work on Tuesday too (it's Tuesday I go back, don't know why I said Wednesday earlier. Baby brain.)

Today I'm feeling some general anxiety about going back to work. That out of control feeling--what if my classes are horrible? I'm gonna miss my across the hall buddy Kristy, as she's now gone, I'm gonna be so tired with getting up with the baby at night and getting up early without any noonish naps, I'm gonna miss the baby, etc. I'm sure it will all work out, right? Right?

Why does Days of Our Lives think that a storyline involving Patch and a screaming baby equate to high comedy? Dude, this is stupid! I turned it. I watched an awesome Lifetime movie the other day--with Delta Burke's husband (not attractive) and Josie Bissett. Deadly Vows. Hysterically bad. Strangely enough, based on a true story. Have you seen it?

They suck.

Maybe I'm a bad parent, but I would be kind of proud of Luke or Jake if they managed to plan something this complicated and, well, funny. :)

HILLIARD, Ohio — A high school student who tricked football fans from a crosstown rival school into holding up squares of construction paper at a stadium that together spelled out, "We Suck,'' was suspended for the prank, students said.
Kyle Garchar, a senior at Hilliard Davidson High School in suburban Columbus, said he spent about 20 hours over three days plotting the trick, which was captured on video and posted on the video-sharing Web site YouTube.
Garchar said he was inspired by a similar prank pulled by Yale students in 2004, when Harvard fans were duped into holding up cards with the same message.
At the end of the video, Garchar wryly thanks the 800 parents, staff and alumni from Hillard Darby High School who raised the cards at the start of the third quarter during last Friday's game played at Crew Stadium, home of Columbus' Major League Soccer team.
"It couldn't have been done without you,'' reads the closing frame of the video, which had been viewed more than 4,400 times by Thursday. Garchar, 17, first went to Crew Stadium to take a picture of the seats. Then he created a grid to plan how the message would be spelled out once fans in three sections held up either a black or white piece of construction paper. Directions left on stadium seats instructed fans to check that the number listed on their papers matched their seat numbers. Darby supporters were told the message would read "Go Darby.'' "It was tedious,'' Garchar said. "I didn't really think it was going to work.'' But it did, and everyone at Hilliard Davidson has been talking about the trick, said Jordan Moore, a junior. "That was the ultimate in-your-face,'' he said. "I think it was ingenious.'' Davidson Principal John Bandow had told students he expected them to show sportsmanship at Friday's football game, which Darby won 21-10 in the first meeting between the two schools. Bandow called Garchar to his office Monday morning, and gave him three days of in-school suspension and also banned him from participating in school activities for a semester, students said. Two other students who helped organize the trick received the same punishment. Hilliard schools spokeswoman Michelle Wray couldn't confirm the students' punishment today because the Federal Education Rights and Privacy Act forbids the release of student disciplinary information. But Jen Trimmer, 17, one of the students involved in the prank, said the suspensions for the three students began Wednesday and were to end Friday. "We weren't expecting it to be such a severe punishment,'' she said today. "We just thought it was all in good fun.'' Stephen Bell, a Darby freshman, was at the stadium but missed the big moment. "It was sneaky, knifing and down right clever,'' he said Wednesday. "But we'll get them back.''


Wanna see it? Go here. Don't forget to check out the other pranks that other colleges have pulled. The Harvard/Yale thing really made me giggle too.

Luke-isms

Two days ago, Chris promised Luke he would take him to the park after work. Unfortunately, dark clouds started rolling in and I came home from running errands to tell the two, "Guys, you won't be able to go to the park."
Chris: "Is it raining?"
Me: "It's about to storm."
Luke refused to believe this piece of news. He ran to the window to look out, "It's fine, Mama. It's fine."
I told him to come out on the porch with me and look up in the sky. "Those dark clouds are full of rainwater and it's about to fall on our heads."
He looked. Then he sat down on the steps and buried his face in his hands and just sobbed. I felt my heart break. "You can go tomorrow baby..."
Well, yesterday Luke ran to Chris and said, "We can go to the park today Dada, because it's BEYOUTIFUL outside!"
I'd never heard him say "beautiful" before and it cracked me up.
They went to the park and came back sweaty but happy.
"I need juice, Mama. And ice." Luke informed me, as he headed up the steps inside the cool air conditioning.

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He's noticing clouds. He told my mom and dad, "That bear is eating that mountain." He pointed up to the clouds. Mom said that it did indeed look like a bear and mountain.

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When Dad picked him up for an outing with "PawPaw", I met him at the door.
"Where's Luke?" he asked.
"On the computer," I told him.

"That sounds weird."
It was true. My boy points, clicks, etc. like a pro. His favorite site is http://www.noggin.com/. He's driving me crazy with the "That's What Friends Are For" song under the Wow Wow Wubzy category.

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Every time someone visits his baby brother he says to them, "Awwww, baby brudder....awww...(pats or kisses his head) see him? Ba----by bruddddder....awww..."

Go visit my former student's new blog and give her some comments/love.

Mystery, Dreams, Rain, and Booklearnin'

It may be time for me to go back to work. I just asked The Pick Up Artist's "Mystery" to be my friend on Myspace. Lord have mercy.

I plan on getting out and voting today in the local election. I'm votin' all incumbents out. Cuz they suck.

Last night I had a dream that I was on a little motorcycle that could fly. It was awesome. I was out on a beautiful field too. Flyin' all around like a crazy person. It's been a long time since I had a flying type dream. The night before I dreamed that I married John Krasinki from The Office. I don't even lurve him all that much. Anyway, I had a fabulous white dress in the dream and his Austrian mother didn't approve of me or my white dress. :)

Jake is cooing a lot and seems to enjoy "interacting" with me lately. He does this "winking" thing and "Elvis smile" thing. He wakes up, typically, 2-3 times a night. Every now and then he wakes up a lot more than that but that's rare. He has a little fuzzy black hair on his ear, like a little animal. It's cute. He has a bit of an umbilical hernia, which is not cute, and that I'm treating with stuff that the doc gave me. Yucky.

Went to my six week check up at the gyno yesterday. Fun was had by all. Not really. Jake screamed the whole time I was being "checked out" which only added to my stress level, but overall it was a good visit. I know you just love knowing this stuff, huh?

Big thanks go out to Jamie, who invited me and the husband out to the lake house over the weekend for a big shrimp boil with her and her pals. What a nice group of people too. I especially enjoyed talking with Jamie and the other wives inside the cool air conditioned house with babies on our knees. Let's do that wine club idea, girl. My favorite part of the day was towards evening, before it got real dark, when the rain was coming down and I sat on the covered porch watching the rain on the water. The buzz from my margarita helped too. Heh. I saw a light on the other side of the lake and thought of Gatsby again. That book is really on my mind lately. Too bad I'm not teaching it this year. I miss teaching 11th grade sometimes.

Speaking of teaching, I DO go back next week--on Wednesday. I'm ready to learn all about my students. I've already gotten a glimpse of them because I had them write letters/essays to me about themselves and had my long term sub bring them to me to read and comment on. She's coming by today to pick them up and give them back to them. A lot of them made me feel all warm inside--seem like sweet kids. (Many of them gave me good wishes on the baby and told me how they were ready to meet me. Awww...brownie points already.)

PS: South Carolina reanswers the question...

Spiderman Parade

Oh South Carolina...

To quote the Caveman, yes I have a response---WHAT?

Guest Post

"Hi, I'm Jake! I'm a month old and I'm almost ten pounds now! Yay!"

Baby's Named a Bad, Bad Thing

For hours of fun, read stuff on this site about bad baby names.
And Amy? I have a Coretta in one of my classes this year. :)

Swaddling, Plumbing, Sickness and Horseface

Thank God for Swaddle Me. These things work like a charm. I wish they had them when Luke was an infant. I can't swaddle with a normal blanket like other people can---these come with a little pouch for the kid's legs and velcro attachments for a tight swaddle. We can put Jake in one of these and he's out like a light within a minute or less. I bought mine from Toys R Us. Target has a brand called Boppy Swaddle, but they aren't as good, in my opinion---they don't swaddle as tight. Jake gets right out of those. I gave Liz a pink Swaddle Me for McKenna because truly, they are the best baby gift.

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Got behind a plumbing truck today. Realized how much I hate the word "plumbing". That b should totally not be there. What word do you hate? Stacy, do you still hate the word "moist"?

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Had little buddy with me at the nail salon this morning. Had just sat down when my cell phone rang. It was Chris---Luke needed picking up from daycare. He was sick. Boo. I had to leave with my not even half done nails and go get him. He was glad to see me when I picked him up. "Hi Mama. My tummy hurts." Bless him. Now he's bundled up watching Little Bear and Jake is taking a nap.

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I have a confession. I love watching Tori and Dean: Inn Love. How wrong is that? I admire her for letting us see the not so cute post baby fatness and bad angles. I don't admire her for being a husband stealing ho. Anyway, there is something about this show that is very entertaining. Anyone else watching this? I watch too much TV these days, huh?

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Tomorrow Jake will be a month old! How did that happen? This maternity leave is going by too quickly.

Dr. Spock?

Okay, so some of you know we have a housekeeper that comes in just a couple of times a month to help out...she gives me so much blog material but I forget to blog about it...well here's some stuff from today.
She was giving me baby advice. Now this is the woman who told me (when Luke was teething) that I just needed to hang an egg from the northwestern corner of Luke's room and when it was rotten, he would no longer suffer from teething. Yeah.

She came in this morning and saw that I had baby J all swaddled up.
"Look at him! Him just wants to use his arms! Awww, yes, Mama gots his arms all bound down and he wants to touch and explore! Poor thing wants to use his arms!" (All in a happy baby voice)
I kept him swaddled. She wandered off eventually.

Later she decided he was having some gas issues.
"You need to lay him on his stomach. Go ahead. Lay him on his stomach." I wanted to roll my eyes. He was not having gas issues. Plus? BACK to SLEEP lady! Anyway, I put him on his stomach to quiet her down since I was standing right there to watch him. We stared at him in the crib. He started making hungry noises (every Mama knows her baby's hungry noise) so I picked him up.
"Aww, you are spoiling this one too!" (Again, in a "pleasant" voice but also in that voice that means "I'm really telling you what I think")
"I am not spoiling him, S!" I just laughed her off.

And lastly, as I was getting ready to take the baby to run errands with me, I sat him in his bouncy to look at me while I dried my hair.
She came in and turned his bouncy chair in the direction of the TV.
"Babies like watching TV. My grandchillin watched hours of it when they were babies!"
LOL.

Jen Reviews the Hits

I kind of like the "Beautiful Girls" song but I was bothered by the "suicidal" thing too. It's just repeated too often for my taste. I also don't like the lyric about "commited my first crime"...as in "I'm sure I'll commit more and that's cool."
Whatever.
Good sound to it though. Too bad there's 2 strikes against it in my book.

Songs I am loving right now (because I pretty much only listen to Top 40--not very progressive, I know):

Fergie's "Big Girls Don't Cry" (although the blanket lyric makes me roll my eyes)

Plain White T's "Hey There Delilah"---the longing in that dude's voice is so real sounding to me--"It's what you do to me..."

and Lifehouse's "First Time" song has a real 80s feel to it that I love. Here's the video.

What songs are you "all about" (as the kids say) right now?

Monday

Yesterday...in the house...

I was wearing a jacket, had long pants and socks on, and I was drinking coffee.

Chris: "You cold or something?"

Jen: "What gave it away?"

We got a new AC a couple of weeks ago and my man is really enjoying the arctic temps.

Chris, looking down at his shorts and t-shirt: "Something must be wrong with me! I was thinking about turning the fan on!"

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Two nicknames for baby Jake right now: Snorty McSnorterson (because he snorts when he's hungry) and Popeye (cuz he kind of looks like him at times). Toot toot!

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I really hate Bret Michaels and Scott Baio now. That's what their reality shows did for them. Good job fellas. I doubt I'm the only one who feels this way. Oh, and I still hate Peter Brady dude too---that drunk.

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Here are some pictures from Dusty's wedding....

Sunday

Hopefully no one will be blowing a conch or rolling boulders off mountains.
Anyone else kind of intrigued by Kid Nation?
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Luke just walked up to me, poked my arm, and said, "Excuse me, Sir." What the???
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I love it when Luke pats Jake on the head and says, "Awww baby brudder...awww..."
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Got up irritated around 3 this morning to feed the baby and my irritation went away when I looked down at Jake in my arms and he was just looking up at me with his sweet shiny dark eyes and the slightest hint of a "smile". Bless him.
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Congratulations to Liz and Matt, who had baby McKenna on Wednesday! Jake and I went back to the hospital on Friday to visit them. It was weird being back there seeing the same nurses I had. Of course they had pretty much forgotten my face and name already and no one gave a crap. I wanted to say, "What was I? Just another patient? Didn't we have something...sob...special??? The way I bugged you for more pain pills? The gentle way I asked for water?"

Diabeetus.

Get ready to dance.

Fresh pics...

Some photos from today.

Hi.

Remember after I got home from the hospital and I blogged like crazy? Remember those days? Seems like I'm losing my edge. More to the point, the sleep cycle is eating away at my brain. Ahh, this too shall pass. I'll take a moment here (while I drink my fantastic coffee with Hazelnut Fat Freet Coffeemate) to say hey and say some stuff, then I'll delve back into babyzone.
I don't have that much to say. I'll just wing it. Okay. Meredith Viera? On the Today Show? Is kind of a bitch to guests. I liked her on The View. But here she has surprised me with how rude she is. It's like she doesn't have a filter.
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Those miners? They need to stop showing those little stick figures upright. That's all I'm sayin'. Bless their hearts.
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I went to bed at 7:30 last night. Of course I was up again at 8:30, but I had my pjs on and face washed at 7:30. I felt like I was eight years old.
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Seersucker suits---sharp or old man lookin'? You tell me.
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At the wedding I attended Saturday, there were some teenage girls who seem to think that a swimsuit cover up and flip flops constitutes dressing up. What the heck? (I'm sure they weren't really swimsuit cover ups, but they looked like it!)
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This toy recall is BULLSHIT!!!! Makes me so mad.
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This is all I got right now. :) I'm telling you, my brain is mush.

Question: What's more fun than up every 2 hours to feed and change an infant?
Answer: Also having to take care of your three-year-old who has a fever.

I feel delirious. So tired...

Congrats

Congratulations to Dusty and Brandi, who got married yesterday in Troy. It was a beautiful wedding. Glad it was indoors!

Also a big congrats to my former co-worker Charlotte, who found out she is expecting her second son! Yay! Two boys=awesome. :)

Yeah, am I on the air?

Hysterical. C-SPAN prank calls. Another gem Chris found. (Warning: language!)

Fri

Yesterday I had a couple of hours to myself---Mom kept the baby while I went shopping for some clothes for Dusty's wedding tomorrow. I found some good stuff at Old Navy (and if you are shopping for some sweat pants or tanks you are in luck, kid) but not anything for the wedding. Then I found some sexy pointy shoes at Shoe Station (my favorite shoe place) and finally a skirt I can wear at TJ Maxx. While at TJ Maxx, I ran into a former student whose name is Curtis. Curtis happens to be a black boy. It always amuses me when I hug one of my former students (usually, yes, black boys and girls but I'm talking about the boys primarily here) because you can see the confused and pained looks on the old white ladies around me. They are trying to figure out our relationship. You can almost see the light go on when they realize it must be a former teacher/student conversation and then they look almost relieved. Ha ha. Good ole Curtis has been keeping up with me on Myspace and asked me all about the baby.

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Even though I've gotten out a bit lately, I still feel like I've become socially retarded holing up in the house all summer with a toddler and now with a baby. Because of this, please excuse me if I sound weird on the phone and find it hard to talk like a normal adult. I've noticed that I'm totally out of practice with small talk and just keeping a conversation halfway going. Might also be the lack of sleep huh? (Hope, did you find that I sounded like a moron while we talked this morning??)

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Anyone watching The Pick Up Artist on VH1? Chris and I are enjoying it immensely--especially "Mystery" himself. He doesn't seem to judge the guys too harshly--seems pretty kind to me.

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How do babies know to wake up and/or cry as soon as you sit down to relax or right before you take a bite out of your much anticipated (and way too late) lunch?

You Smell.

Luke has started thinking that words like pee pee, poo poo, butt, and ding dong are hilarious. Yeah, he's at that age. He also thinks that saying "You smell like...(plus one of the above words)" is high comedy. Chris and I started trying to steer him clear of the offensive words, bantering back and forth with stuff like, "You smell like trees!" "You smell like water!" etc.

Yesterday, Chris and Luke were cracking each other up with the "You Smell Like" game, using non offensive words, when all of a sudden, Luke looked at a magazine for ideas on words to use. I saw the wheels turning. "You smell like the sky!"
Chris: "Oh yeah? Well you smell like a cloud!"
Luke: (Looking down at the picture of a soccer game.) "You smell like balls, Dada!"

Oh my. We cracked up. Parents of the year, right?

The heat reminds me of Gatsby

We had luncheon in the dining-room, darkened too against the heat, and drank down nervous gayety with the cold ale.
“What’ll we do with ourselves this afternoon?” cried Daisy, “and the day after that, and the next thirty years?”
“Don’t be morbid,” Jordan said. “Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall.”
“But it’s so hot,” insisted Daisy, on the verge of tears, “and everything’s so confused. Let’s all go to town!”

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“Who wants to go to town?” demanded Daisy insistently. Gatsby’s eyes floated toward her. “Ah,” she cried, “you look so cool.”
Their eyes met, and they stared together at each other, alone in space. With an effort she glanced down at the table.
“You always look so cool,” she repeated.

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The room was large and stifling, and, though it was already four o’clock, opening the windows admitted Only a gust of hot shrubbery from the Park. Daisy went to the mirror and stood with her back to us, fixing her hair.
“It’s a swell suite,” whispered Jordan respectfully, and every one laughed.
“Open another window,” commanded Daisy, without turning around.
“There aren’t any more.”
“Well, we’d better telephone for an axe——”
“The thing to do is to forget about the heat,” said Tom impatiently. “You make it ten times worse by crabbing about it.”

Dang, I love that book.

Visitors

We've had a lot of visitors here lately. This weekend, my in-laws came down to spend some time with us and their new grandson. My mother-in-law took me out of the house for a little bit of shopping, to get my nails done, and for lunch. It was great---I hadn't been out of the house other than to the hospital in 2 weeks. I felt weirded out by all the colors and noise outside; it was like I'd been in "the hole". Ha.

Earlier in the week, Jamie came by with lots of dinners she had made for us. We've already had one of them, Jamie--the stuffed shells. Very good!!! I'll include a pic of Jamie in this entry. Chris's brother Cory (aka "Boyband Cory!" Haha) came by unexpectedly and that was a treat. Luke showed off his mad skillz on the Spiderman Scooter that his "Uncle Kwory" gave him for his birthday in June.

It's a Baby Brother Thing.

Jake was crying the other day and Luke hollered, "Where's his lid? Where's his lid?" (While he looked for his pacifier.)

The boys. I like how Luke is all "teenage hairstyle" lookin' here...and here is Jake's "I'm about to go home from the hospital" official picture. He wouldn't cooperate so this was the best shot of all of them. He's kinda doing the "Uncle Rico" pose here. Last pic is from yesterday. Amazing how much he's changed in one week, huh?

The Empty Pill Bottle Stares at Me Like a Lover...

Last night...

Chris: I see you took your last Percocet.

Jen: Yes.

Chris: I thought I heard Taps playing...

Jen: I took it then watched Dr. Phil. It was awesome.

Liz and Me!

Here are some pictures that were taken the day before I went in the hospital, so almost two weeks ago. Pictured with me is my friend Liz, who I've known for about five years. We met when we were in a comedy group together (I only stayed around for about six months, since I knew I wasn't really that funny; it was just a good way to meet people--and I met Chris, so it all worked out!) Liz is due in a few weeks with her first child, a daughter she will name McKenna.

Yay! I feel refreshed!

Little guy slept pretty well last night. He only woke up for a diaper change and feeding at 12:30, 2:30, 4 and 6:30. (And yes, that's considered really good around here!). I actually woke up at 8:30 because I wanted to and went ahead and made some coffee! Whew. It was so nice to catch up on some sleep. Somewhat. :)

There's a lot of infomercials on at 3:00 AM

Last night...whoo...was torture. I couldn't get the baby to sleep very much. I was so relieved when the morning came/Luke got up and Chris took over so I could sleep.
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Blues came back last night something awful. I've read that 85 percent of new moms have this, so most of you who have had babies might be able to remember those feelings. It's the weirdest, saddest feeling. Changes in hormones are mainly to blame. And don't worry, it's nothing like I want to hurt me or the baby. Nothing like that.
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I applaud Febreze for celebrating the joy of huffing chemicals. I mean, COME ON. Have you seen the latest commercials? That's HUFFING. Go to rehab! Spraying chemicals on your fabric, then immediately inhaling them is not healthy.
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I gave up on Ian McEwan's Saturday. I was just freakin' bored. While I was somewhat interested in reading about how the surgeon met his wife, and his relationship with his children, it's just soooo SLOW. When I find time to read a little bit, I expect to enjoy reading it. It was like wading through mud. Someone else recommended Life of Pi. Maybe I'll try that next.
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Luke has started sucking on pacifiers. Nice.
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Constantine Mauralis (sp?) looks like a puppet from the mid 80s "Land of Confusion" video. Chris pointed this out.
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Wednesday with Luke

Me: So what do you want to do today?

Luke: Um, go to the store and buy a new Buzz.

Me: Maybe, if you are a VERY good boy and don't jump on the couch today.

Luke: It's okay, Mama. It's O---kay. I might. (Self-satisfied smile.)

(He might be a good boy? He might jump on the couch? He might get a Buzz toy?)

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Later I caught him sitting in Hope's gift to baby Jake, a Bumbo seat.

Me: What are you doing?

Luke: Sitting in the baby brother thing.

Me: Oh. Aren't you too big?

Luke: No, I'm not.

1 minute later---"I'm stuckkkkkkk..."